Little Creatures

I share my small apartment with seven pets. Luckily, none of them weigh more that four ounces.

This is Ghost the Betta fish. He was given to me by a good friend who moved away. Ghost spends most of his time threatening his own reflection in the walls of the glass bowl that is his home.

I also have four brine shrimp who live in a biosphere that is completely sealed. Oxygen is provided by algae. All I need to do is make sure it gets sunlight every day so that the algae will grow. Brine shrimp are the creatures they sold as Sea Monkeys in the back of old comic books when I was a kid. Unfortunately, these shrimp never wear a crown and carry a trident while riding around in a chariot pulled by sea horses.

I also have two pet mice. They are impossible to take a picture of because they never stop moving. Their names are Snatch and Patch.

I've had pets all of my life. I think what I really need is a pet I can carry around, pet, and cuddle. You really can't cuddle brine shrimp.

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Answer Me Jesus

Last Thursday, September 14, was my forty-second birthday. It was a really nice day, full of friends and cake and presents and Barnes and Nobles gift cards! Today I got a package for my birthday from my friend Trish in Houston, and it contained an "Answer Me Jesus." This is a variation of the old "Magic Eight Ball" concept with the octagonal answer device floating up out of the inky, midnight-blue water to reveal the answer to any question you ask. The Jesus figurine gives you answers like "The Holy Water Will Sting!" and "I Died for This?" I find the concept of a hot-pink Jesus used as a cheap, fortune-telling device both hysterical and a little blasphemous. Actually, more hysterical than blasphemous because I laughed out loud when I saw it. As I held it in my hand, turning it up and down, and asking it questions like, "Should I go to Taco Bell?" I began to wonder, "Just what constitutes blasphemy and what does not?"

The "Answer Me Jesus" is sold at Urban Outfitters, and considering recent events in the news, the logical question is, "What would happen if Urban Outfitters began selling "Answer Me Mohammads? Would Muslims extremists across the world begin burning their distressed jeans in protest? Would 'goth kids' in the malls of America become the target of a jihad?"

Obviously, blasphemy, like pornography, is largely in the eye of the beholder. I would consider gangsters who tattoo "The Virgin of Guadalupe" on their backs, and then go on to commit the most violent, despicable acts blasphemous. Evangelical Christians who consider their relative prosperity as a gift from God when they are no more devout then a peasant woman in Chiapas, Mexico could be considered blasphemous. Did the Buddha really spend a lifetime in contemplation and self-reflection to be used as a good luck charm next to the cash registers of countless Chinese restaurants? Are the companies that manufacture rosaries, crucifixes, and other religious paraphenalia for profit blasphemous? Is buying a Tibetan prayer wheel and using it as a knick-knack on your coffee table blasphemous?

I think the answer lies in the intent and spirit of both the creator and consumer of the potentially offending object or act. Madonna's "mock crucifixion" is blasphemous, not because she is mocking the crucifixion of Christ, but because it is such an obvious, insincere, cynical, and poorly considered attempt to bait the media and religious conservatives. Madonna is lobbing a defective hand grenade of controversy over the walls of her celebrity into a public that is just a little bored by this middle-aged woman clinging desperately to cultural relevance. I suppose it is possible that Madonna truly believes what she is doing is creative and artistic, but she certainly hasn't made me believe it. I love Madonna's music because it's fun, not because she is an astute social critic.

And this brings me back to the "Answer Me Jesus." What I've always liked about the story of Christ is his humanity. We are taught that Christ was "A man like us in all things but sin," which means he must have had a sense of humor. When we think of Christ, we think of the pain and suffering of the crucifixion, but is that all we are to remember? When I look at my "Answer Me Jesus," I think of spending afternoons looking at my Magic Eight Ball and asking questions about my future like, "Will I ever be famous?" and "Will Parker Stevenson ever pull up outside my house in a limo and take me away from this hell-hole town?" I think of my friend, Trish, and how we laughed when we saw our first "Answer Me Jesus" in an Urban Outfitters in the Mall of America on our way to attend our friend's wedding. I look at my hot-pink Jesus, and I feel no intent to blaspheme and denigrate a man who's teachings are the most profound the world has ever known. I see humor and friendship. And while I haven't gone so far as to actually do so, I know that if I were to ask the question, "Should I keep you "Answer Me Jesus"? I know the answer would come, floating up through the inky darkness and it would say...

"I Would."

amarillo(royal dragoon gaurds)

Very funny video. I think these guys may be British soldiers in Irag. It was made a year ago, and I hope they are all home safe. Notice how there is nothing on the horizon, and absolutely no plant life.

Scissor Sisters

Scissor Sisters - I Don't Feel Like Dancing

The latest from the Scissor Sisters! Sounds great!

A picture of an aswang?

While driving home this evening, I was listening to that old favorite of mine, Art Bell, on the radio. He recently began broadcasting from the Phillipines where he has relocated to be with his new wife, and he was talking about a mythological creature called an aswang, which is actually the name of several types of creatures as I found out from Wikipedia:

Aswang
An Aswang (or Asuwang) is a ghoul in Filipino folklore. The myth of the aswang is popular in the Western Visayan regions such as Capiz, Iloilo and Antique. The trademark or major feature of Aswangs which distinguish them from other Filipino mythological creatures is their propensity to replace stolen cadavers with the trunk of a banana tree carved in the cadaver's likeness. They are also said to like to eat small children. Their favorite body parts are the liver and heart. Other local names, especially in Capiz are tik-tik and wak-wak.
Genre
Aswang, at times is also a generic term applied to all types of mythological creatures, ghosts, manananggals, witches, shapeshifters, lycanths and monsters. Aswang is often interchanged with manananggal, but they are different. There are also characteristics and features that the Aswang also varies from Filipino to Filipino. The paragraph below is more common or a typical description of the aswang
Capiz
With respect to Aswang, Capiz (a province on Panay island) is the subject or focus of many Aswang, and other types of mythological and folkloric ghosts (multo), goblins, ghouls, manannagal, witches (mangkukulam), giant half-horse men (tikbalang) and other monster stories, especially for tabloids. Capiz is (unfairly) rumored to have a number of aswang and covens of witches. Superstitious folk who believe in their existence can still be found in these parts. They typically adorn windows, rooms, etc. with garlic bulbs, holy water, and other anti- aswang paraphernalia. which supposedly repels these creatures. Aswangs have the ability to transform into other shapes like a dog, a bat and a snake.
Superstitions
The myth of the Aswang is popular in the Visayan region of the Philippines, specially in the western provinces of Capiz, Iloilo, Antique. Aside from entertainment value, mothers are said to tell their children Aswang stories to keep them off the streets and keep them home at night. Similar to Count Vlad III Dracula of Transylvania in Vampire stories, the most popular characters are the clan of Teñente/ Tenyente/ Tiniente Gimo of the town of Dueñas.
Appearance and activities
An aswang is a regular townsperson by day and prefer an occupation related to meat, such as butchery or making sausages.
Aswangs have an ageless appearance and a quiet, shy and elusive manner. They can be distinguished from humans by two signs. One is the bloodshot eyes from staying up all night looking for opportunities to sneak into houses where funeral wakes are being held, and stealing the dead bodies. According to the elderly, the Aswang can also transform from human to animal and animal to human. The Aswang can disguise him/herself as a pig, dog or a black bird. Supposedly if a person looks at them in the eyes, the reflection would appear inverted. During their nocturnal activities, they walk with their feet facing backwards. One type is the tik-tik which transforms into a huge bird at night and prowls. The tik-tik looks for a sleeping person. Then extends a very long proboscis into the unsuspecting victim and proceeds to suck the blood. While performing, a 'tik-tik' sound is heard. In some stories, the tik-tik is an aswang's familiar, said to confuse people by its 'tik-tik' sound. If the aswang is near, the sound would be faint so that people hearing it would think that the aswang is still far away. The term wak-wak or wuk-wuk is frequently used for the same creature in the Cebu region. The legends of the wak-wak and tik-tik are much the same, but the wak-wak is specifically supposed to change into its birdlike form by leaving behind its lower body, much like the Manananggal, another Philippine vampire. The cry of a night bird which makes a "wuk-wuk-wuk" sound is believed to be the call of this monster and is feared by superstitious villagers. As with the call of the tik-tik, the wak-wak is believed able to make its cry sound distant when the creature is near. In a certain town of Capiz (Panitan), another type of aswang is believed to exist, which they refer to as the Dangga or Agitot. This type of aswang is typically funny because some say it is a handsome gay man that hunts women during the night and eats fresh blood like a vampire. But its existence cannot be properly supported by evidence. Another familiar is the sigbin or Zegben. Some say that this is another form that the aswang transforms into and yet some say it is the companion of the tik-tik. It appears to be similar to the chupacabra and Tasmanian devil in appearance with the exception of spotty fur. It supposedly has a wide mouth with large fangs.
Some people not familiar with the local wildlife of the Phillipines will confuse the legendary Aswang with the very real fruit bats of south east Asia. See this purported image of an aswang, and compare it to this image of a fruit bat in flight.

Dealing with Aswangs
It is said that an Aswang can be revealed, with the use of a bottle of a special oil made from coconut and mixed with certain plant stems upon which special prayers were said. When an Aswang comes near or walks outside the house at night, the oil is supposed to boil and continue boiling until the aswang leaves the area. They are also said to abhor garlic.

Somebody has dubbed cats that look like Hitler kitlers. To see more pictures of pure evil look here: http://www.catsthatlooklikehitler.com/

more self punching

There are 17,107 videos in this group. Truly a sign of the apocalypse.

funny asian

Watch his head. This is why the future lies on the eastern Pacific rim.

Heather Small - Radio On

I like the dancers in this video, and I like Heather Small's voice. She needs a really good song though. This isn't it.